One great big Schack bass!!

That should be paired with this:

FINALLY! THE BROWN NOTE IS WITHIN REACH!!!

I crapped myself just looking at it!

oh my god... O.O That thing looks like it could blow you over!

If Richard Kiel played bass?

I'd hate to see the flightcase for that bass, yet alone be the one packing it in the van!
Do Comfort Straps make a long enough strap?
The SVT rig looks just right for the local wine bar gig!

I've seen that Schack on ebay for years now...on and off, and no one ever buys it.  Seems like a pretty ridiculous item, but I guess that may be the point, in a dadaistic sort of way.

Great bass for someone overcompensating for other shortcomings.